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#GOINGGREY

  • Writer: Bridget A. Carlisle
    Bridget A. Carlisle
  • Jul 8
  • 3 min read

As a girl mom, I look for opportunities even now that they’re grown, to speak truths to my girls in a desire to instill in them healthy confidence in how they view themselves and others. One of those truths that I pray each of them possess is the heart knowledge that their outward appearance doesn’t define their beauty or worth. Don’t get me wrong, I like to feel good about how I present myself, but beauty takes on many different shapes and forms (internally and externally); which sometimes we forget when competing with what society deems pretty.  

I’m not naive in thinking my words have always been eloquent, I’ve failed to deliver the correct message to my girls on more than one occasion. In fact, facing the truth means that a lot of what they’ve learned from me has come from witnessing me getting back on the horse after my own personal failures. Regardless of how it’s come, I’ve had the benefit of reaping some of the rewards of the truism I’ve tried to instill in each of my little chicks as they now encourage and challenge me to reshape how I see myself.    

As I approach my 55th birthday I want to fully embrace changing things that don’t align with the more simplistic way I want to live. Now listen up y’all! I’m not declaring myself old at this milestone, nor laxing family rules about posting unapproved pictures, but my preferred lane in life doesn’t align with regular hair maintenance or make-up. I’ve been blessed to spend loads of time traveling in the van over the last couple of years and have fully embraced my natural curl (frizz) and now I’m ditching the dye! For those that have heard me echo this sentiment before, stick with me, I’ve never declared it in a public forum and with a picture. Yikes! I'm hoping this makes me accountable to stick with it, right now it's hard!

Beginning Radiation Treatment - December 2020
Beginning Radiation Treatment - December 2020

At the age of 50, while going through breast cancer, I contemplated making this change. I remember waiting for Oncotype DX testing results to determine if chemotherapy would be a part of my treatment plan. I had a breakdown one night as I contemplated coloring my hair in the face of knowing that I might lose it. I was fortunate and my treatment plan didn’t include chemotherapy, but I hung on to the idea of still ditching the dye. I didn’t want to be tied to something that seemed so inconsequential in the face of a health crisis. I wanted to embrace the ways in which my body was changing because of cancer and natural progression. However, I had a conversation with someone important to me who told me that I was too young to stop dying my hair. All the while…they’re greying, balding, and witnessing the effects of aging themselves. The only difference, the P versus the V! Society says grey men are distinguished and attractive, women are old and no good anymore. I carried those words with me for 5 years and I wish I would have spoken up for myself then, but I can now…#GOINGGREY #PRETTY #NOMAKEUP #NOFILTER

If you want to join the movement, please share your own struggles to normalize the conversation and compliment others either going through or having completed the process. The grown out for us dark hair girls is challenging! If you really want to get onboard, click the picture to the right and head over to my shop to pick up a shirt. #GOINGGREY

4 Comments


rachaelcecil71
Jul 08

Thank you for this. There is so much pressure to “stay young” looking. I’m proud to have made it this far. I hope more join us in this liberating movement.

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Bridget A. Carlisle
Bridget A. Carlisle
Jul 08
Replying to

I love that we can share this story together. It encourages me.

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Scott Carlisle
Scott Carlisle
Jul 08

I love this post, proud of you. I’ve told you for years that you are beautiful without all the makeup, this is true today. Proud of you for sharing this journey with the world. Love you❤️❤️

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Bridget A. Carlisle
Bridget A. Carlisle
Jul 08
Replying to

Love you babe! Thank you for those words. Over the last 23 years you’ve proven them to be true. 😍

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Taylor Dane
Bridget and Scott - Trunk Bay, USVI
Alice

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